Your kidneys: Beans of stability

The old adage that "You don't know what you have until you've lost it" is applicable in so many facets of our lives. In love, friendship, with work or money. But most people never stop to think about how it might apply to their bodies. Sure we all grow older and as we do some of us may find that we have a little less hair, a bit poorer eyesight or the occasional aches and pains that our younger selves never would have dreamed of. But what if a part of you just stopped working altogether? It's not something most would think about. And thankfully, they really don't have to. But I think it would behoove anyone to stop for a minute and think about what any one part of your body does for you and how totally screwed you would be without it. Obviously without a heart you wouldn't be able to live. Same for your lungs. And because of their very obvious necessity those two organs garner all the glory in the game of keeping you alive.

I think you can see where this is going. I'm here to shill for the often overlooked regulators of so much of our bodies consistency: the kidneys. We all learned in school that the kidneys main functions is to filter our blood and produce urine, the means our body has to get rid of all the bad stuff that you might not even know is in you. But do we really know what that entails. What exactly is it getting rid of? Even I, who have had kidney problems since before I was even born, didn't fully appreciate the importance of the kidneys until I found myself quite literally without any.

Let's look at some of the unpleasantness that the kidneys get rid of for us. The excess sodium that we all take in every day is filtered and sent packing by those magic beans. If they didn't we'd all bloat up like a Macy's balloon. Hypernatremia is the technical term for this eventuality and it can lead to anything from the aforementioned swelling to lethargy all the way to coma.

The kidneys are also in charge of regulating the amount of potassium in the body. Do you know what the main ingredient is in that little lethal cocktail they give inmates on death row? Potassium. An overabundance of the stuff will cause every muscle in your body to completely shut down, including your heart. And as I've mentioned the heart is kind of important if you want to keep from shuffling loose your mortal coil.

How about calcium? Think that stuff is important? Yep. Your kidneys regulate the levels of calcium in your body, as well. Without kidneys you are sure to suffer from what's called hypocalcemia. Because your kidneys no longer work your body lacks sufficient amounts of a vitamin D which helps redirect the calcium in your diet to your bones so you can grow big and strong. Without vitamin D to do that your bones don't get the calcium it needs and we've all seen Sally Fields in enough Boniva commercials to know what that does.

So where does that calcium go? It has to go somewhere, right? Well another job of the kidneys is to keep the levels of phosphorus in your body in check. Too much phosphorus and your body starts to take that calcium and deposit it into your blood vessels and harden them eventually leading to good times like heart attacks. High phosphorus also leads to deposits of said calcium on your skin and the most irritating itching you could possibly imagine. Where does all that phosphorus come from you ask? Rare foods such as milk, cheese, anything with protein in it, chocolate, beer, ice cream, beans or anything with whole grains.

Another important and little known function of the kidney is to regulate your blood pressure. By getting rid of the excess water in your body, your kidneys keep your blood pressure at a constant, normal level. When the kidneys shut down you are unable to get rid of that excess fluid you take in in the form of drinks, soups or really anything that melts. 30-50 ounces a day is the recommended intake of fluid for a dialysis patient. That's roughly one Sonic Route 44 drink a day and that's it. Otherwise your body finds places to put anything more than that you may drink. Places such as in between your cells. Or maybe in your lungs. Eventually you will find yourself unable to breathe and your heart unable to beat because of all that fluid crushing it under it's weight and those extra drinks you had are the reason you are on a ventilator in the hospital.

How do you feel about red blood cells? Kind of important, yeah? Well without functioning kidneys your body doesn't produce enough of the hormone erythropoietin which controls red blood cell production in your body. Without sufficient red blood cells you are prone to anemia which most end stage renal disease patients are. Luckily there is a shot you can take to boost the production of those cells. It's called EPO and it just got Lance Armstrong in a lot of trouble. No entering the Tour de France for me.

So while the heart and lungs get all the glory it's your kidneys that are doing a lot of the heavy lifting to keep your veins from calcifying, your bones from weakening, your blood pressure from shooting through the roof causing you to stroke out and they keep all that fluid you drink/eat from sitting on your lungs and heart keeping them from actually doing the jobs they are so recognized for.

Those inconspicuous beans sitting on your sides are what keep everything else in your body in check. So next time you are getting a check up have the doctor give your kidneys a pass and see how they're doing. Thanks to dialysis, losing your kidneys isn't a death sentence like losing other things. At least not immediately, but it can lead to pain, illness and just general unwellness if they aren't looked after. Keeping your kidneys healthy also keeps one off of dialysis which brings with it it's own set of problems and surprises. Just something to think about.